Am I menopausal?!

Lately I have been feeling very irritable, like I’m about to rip someone’s head off because they coughed very loudly (how rude). I also seem to be tweezing my upper lip tash and my chin whiskers a bit more frequently than usual. On top of that is a feeling of sluggishness and tiredness all the time.

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Should I just take a chill pill and enter a Tom Selleck look alike competition or is this something more serious? That’s what I was asking myself. Maybe these are the first signs of the perimenopause, the prequel to the full blown menopause because mother nature is kind like that and provides us gals with several bouts of hormonal craziness.

At the age of 37 it would be a bit early for me but according to google some women may experience perimenopause before their 40s. I always recommend consulting the internet for medical issues, NOT! So I may not be menopausal yet but let’s see what I can look forward to in a few years down the line.

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Besides the symptoms I’m already experiencing, irritability and excess facial hair, there are hot flushes, vaginal dryness (Score!), weak bladder with risk of peeing yourself when sneezing a bit too hard (Yes, please!). I better make a note in my online dating profile ‘Can’t take long walks at the beach, need to be near a public toilet at all times.’

Thank you nature for dealing women such a great hand, constantly at the mercy of our hormones. As if puberty and PMS aren’t bad enough, when we thought we’ve seen it all and been through the worst, you throw us that charmer of the menopause. The bearded angry woman wearing adult nappies. No way I’ll ever find a man like that. But I guess with all that vaginal dryness to look forward to, there wouldn’t be much point anyway.

For now I just chalk up my recent bad humoured phase to PMS (great being bloated and constipated for a week while simultaneously not being able to stop eating) and blame other people. Mainly other people, can’t you sneeze quietly?!